


The Return of Cer(b)e(ru)s

by Emma_s_underlined_mine_of_writing



Category: Joker Game (Anime)
Genre: Adopted Children, Family Bonding, Family Feels, Family Secrets, Father-Daughter Relationship, Gen, Kid Fic, Long Lost/Secret Relatives, Off-screen Relationship(s), Period-Typical Racism, small amounts of time period racism
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-08-20
Updated: 2017-09-05
Packaged: 2018-12-12 05:09:00
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 13
Words: 11,402
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11730150
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Emma_s_underlined_mine_of_writing/pseuds/Emma_s_underlined_mine_of_writing
Summary: It's September 1945, and Emma has lived with her father in Hawaii almost as long as she could remember. She doesn't remember anything of her mom, though. The closest is her saying how she'll see dolphins with her tomorrow. So it's really confusing when she over hears her father yelling with a police like guy over how she might have to go to England to see her mom. Even more scary is that her father might be a kidnapper, or some other type of evil guy if he isn't her father. Maybe her father really is a spy. Maybe she was kidnapped. Is her Papa a bad guy then? And why is her mom only now trying to find her?Can seven and a half old Emma use her spying detective powers to find out?(Emma is confused about what's going on, so she acts like a detective to try to find out)





	1. The First Hint of Frost

**Author's Note:**

> This is my first Ao3 fanfic, and I share my name with the cute little girl of this story. I got the title from Ceres, who is the Roman version of Persephone's mom. As you know (and in case you don't) Persephone was taken by Hades to the underworld. His dog is Cerberus. I did that to tie in the Greek mythology of the original story. Just so you know, Emma of the story doesn't care that she was adopted, but is afraid that it was kidnapping because Amari lied to her about a lot of things when she thought that he was incapable of lying, and is possibly a spy. He lied about a lot of things, including about where she came from, so how does she know that it wasn't kidnapping?  
> The racism tag isn't because I wanted to write any canon person as a racist, but Amari does face some prejudice and problems that wouldn't occur if he were white.  
> Also, this may just all be an excuse for me to write about them in Hawaii while actually having a plot. Please enjoy.

"Papa, come play with me!" I shout from outside our house. It is near the jungle, and since his office is a really big room with really big door windows, I'm allowed to talk really loud, though not at school. Tomorrow is Monday, so I have to go back to school tomorrow. Papa isn't always with me because sometimes he has to make a business trip somewhere. One time, he was gone for an entire month. I don't know why he goes on business trips when he's a writer, but for some reason he does. If I don't get him to come outside, he'll just spend the rest of the day writing something. "Come on Papa, Frate wants to play with you too!"

"Tell Frate that shouting is bad for you" he says as he continues typing up his thing with a type-writer. "If he wants me to come play, then he should walk over here and ask me."

  
"Papa..." Papa focuses on work way too much. It's bad when he goes traveling without me, though sometimes he brings me with him. He doesn't do anything interesting, though. He just talks to people and writes. Then he takes me sight-seeing and teaches me a lot of cool things about the places we visit, like how the giant rock in the Yu Garden was supposed to be for a palace before the shipment was ship-wrecked, or shows me things like strange plants, giant temples and statues, all other sort of things I didn't know existed. He also knows every language in the world, and he tries to teach me them too. My daddy is amazing.  
But he's too busy to play with me a lot. When he does have time, I end up having to go to school.

Frate comes up to me and makes a sad sound to let me know that he's sad too. "I know, Frate" I say as I rub his head. "Papa is write-aholic". _Maybe he'll stop if I grab the mail? I know that it's the end of the day, but since Papa spent most of the day inside, he might not have picked it up._

But I pick it up when I see it, because I'm a good girl who does her chores and picks up the mail when Papa forgets. _I hope there's something for me_ I think as I look through the letters. My birthday is in two and a half months. Maybe I got a letter from those uncles that Papa says I have. I haven't met them in forever, though. I have a lot of them, about eight, or some number that high. Maybe some are from my mom's side.

That was when I saw a letter addressed to Daddy and me. From someone named Synthia Grane. I never met anyone with the same last name as me who wasn't Papa, and Synthia seems to be my mom's name, so Synthia Grane is probably my mom. I run into his office and say "Papa, I got something from Mom!"

"What?" he says as crouches down to grab the letter. "A letter from Synthia? But how?" Papa grabs the letter and reads it.

Papa's face grows dark. Normally, Papa always smiles and is very confident and happy, though the way he smiles when he isn't talking to the many different people on his business trips seem to be different than when he's with me. I noticed that when he's with me, he's less like a puppet, and his eyes twinkle brightly. He seems brighter, somehow. Papa says that I am very good at reading people, and that I could be like an actress or a spy. I think that I used to think that Papa was a spy for some reason, but he's definitely not. He's not handsome enough, and doesn't act like the people in movies who fall in love with a lot of women. Most importantly, Papa is too _Papa_ to be a spy. Maybe he would be more spy like if he had a mustache.

"I can't believe this, after all these years, she has the nerve to..."

"Um, Papa, what's going on?" I don't know why, but Papa seems smoldering, and I've never seen him like this before. He does get upset when I stay out too late playing on the beaches or exploring the jungle, as well as when I didn't tell him that he stepped in Frate's poop that one time, but now Papa looks really scared and worried as well as fierce. "What does it say?"

Papa looked up from the letter and his face was blank before he put on a fake smile. "It's nothing, Emmy, just something that I never even pondered because it only had a minuscule percentage of occurring."

"Why are you using such big words? Are you trying not to tell me something?"

"Of course not, I just wanted you not to worry about something because I'm your father, and I love you dearly. You know that I love you, right?"

"Of course, Papa!"

"And you love me a whole lot as well, right?"

"Of course! How can I not love you? You're my Papa, and you are so smart!"

"Good girl" he said before rubbing my head. "You are such a good girl, Emma. I'll love you forever."

"What about Frate?" I said after giggling.

"Frate as well. Frate and my little dolphin girl are here to stay in my heart forever." He picked me up and carried me in his arms to my room across the hall. I guess that it must be around bed time.

"Hey Papa, how did we first meet?" I ask for the hundredth time as he tucks me in.

"On a boat head to Hawaii from San Francisco. I was lost, and couldn't come home because I didn't know where home was, but when I saw you, everything just felt better. You had never met me before, so I summoned dolphins by whistling to make you less shy. It was easier than it sounds because I knew that they were ready to head up soon."

"You're so amazing! I want to be a detective like you one day!"

"Detective? Why do you think that I'm a detective?"

"Because you are so smart, and know a lot of things, and are good at puzzles. I would say spy, but you can't be one because you're not like the spies in the movies." 

"Ha ha, yeah, I am definitely not like those spies in movies and books."

"And spies always lie and forget people. You are the opposite of that." Frate arrived and I lifted the cover so he could lie down underneath. I pet him until I feel sleepy. "So you must be a detective."

"I am most certainly not a detective" he says as he tucks me in. "But I am most definitely not like a spy in those movies." He turns off the light, and I am so tired, I'm already dreaming someone saying "In real life, spying isn't like that at all. Spies are very lonely".


	2. Past Stains

Amari read the letter again and sighed. He would call up his boss tomorrow and ask him if Cynthia could possibly take her daughter away from him. Emma was Cynthia's blood, and Amari didn't really have any legal claim over her and Frate beyond the mother giving her blessing. If Cynthia wanted to take them, then maybe she could. He wasn't entirely sure. He stood up and, being a stronger men than most of the "spies" this country produced, didn't kick the desk. Months of living off the grid to raise his new child only to be stolen back by the D Agency, and then to run away when their government hunted them down. He was afraid of a lot of things then; of dying; Emma dying; Frate dying; any of them getting captured; of how the new country they were running away to would treat them. Years of spying for a foreign government, and sacrificing everything just for a new life. There was only one reason he didn't scream and kick and cry over someone trying to steal away the his beloved little daughter and their dog: it would wake them up.

Though he did almost indulge of his old bad habit of smoking. Though the others still joked about it from time to time, they accepted, and possibly even respected him giving up smoking for Emma. He didn't want to hurt his little girl after all. He didn't know what caused it, but he was afraid, and perhaps paranoid, that it would give her something terrible like asthma. He wanted the best for her.

Perhaps that would be the best for her. Cynthia coming along and possibly taking away Emma (he hoped that it was just a visit, though she implied taking her daughter to see her new home and other things in England). He really did struggle living in a country that was very anti Japanese, especially since a lot of the adult Japanese males went to Sand Island. He did try to pass himself off as half Chinese, half-British, which would probably not normally work, but his daughter was a pure English girl. Even the Chinese Americans on the island couldn't tell too well that that he was really Japanese only, and that his daughter was adopted. It helped that despite them being different races, they still looked similar. Perhaps it was because he probably looked like her father. Maybe that was why Cynthia gave them to him.

He was supposed to live in the country of his choice along with his daughter and their puppy as permanent civilian citizens after nearly dying many times for a country that didn't care about his sacrifices. He had to give more then the rest of them did, because he wanted more. He gave them information, a small spy network, and even a pledge of loyalty to them over Yuuki (hopefully the day would never arise that it would be challenged, but he knew better than to hope). All he wanted was to be free, whole, himself, and happy. He thought that being a spy when he first signed up would mean endless freedom flying away from yourself and others, just blending in. He now knew too well that it was merely lying to everyone, even your own self, until you didn't know your own purpose and whether you should really cut off parts of yourself just to play a masquerade. Because masquerades were only stressful, and about cutting off parts of yourself, not gliding freely from one thing to another. There was no freedom at all.

_Only pitch black solitude._

Amari reflected on his mentor's words before deciding that he should at least pick out a presentable suit for tomorrow. He fished around in the closet for something he used to wear all the time before noticing that there was a stain on it.  _I guess that I should wash it. I have to look presentable, and impress them any way that I can._

Though they always seemed to find more flaws in his work than in their own spies. Even though he was miles above them in ability and skill.

No matter how hard he tried, he couldn't wash away the stain. It was bitter, and slightly nauseous, but he almost got used to it after awhile. An hour passed, then two, and then Amari just gave up and let it out to dry. Some stains would never go away.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The next chapter won't be so depressing.


	3. Frostbite

As soon as I saw my house, I started to run, so Papa would spend more time with me. Frate noticed me when I was ten feet away from the house, so he ran up to me. My papa was nowhere in sight.  _Maybe he was kidnapped by spies... or maybe even ninjas._ I've seen that happen to someone in a movie once. I decided to be quiet so I wouldn't disturb any hiding ninjas so they wouldn't take me too. It was a little exciting, but mainly nervous because I've never come home without someone to welcome me. Even when Papa goes on his trips, he hires a maid, or has one of my uncles come over. He also tells me before hand. I was really nervous until I heard shouting.

"Six years of service, and you can't even guarantee that a former assassin won't come to steal my child!"

Maybe I was the one about to get kidnapped. I looked around for something that would hide me, but not an adult. A ninja could be there. They would run away with me, and I would never see Papa and Frate ever again.  _The filing cabinet!_ I pushed it to the corner of the room so when I hid behind it, you couldn't see me on either side. I was barely paying attention to what they were saying, which Papa says I do sometimes, but not a lot a lot, just a little.

"But she's Cynthia's daughter and you're not even her father." I definitely heard that. I wanted to say  _What are you talking about? Of course Papa's my Papa, how can he not be a Papa?_ but then I remembered that Papa hates it when I sneak up on him like that, especially when it's to interrupt, so I didn't say anything.

"- and besides, she gave me her daughter, and you promised me that I could have her."

"But it wasn't a formal adoption" says the other guy, who sounds like Papa's boss. "All she did was allow you to carry off her child, and because of that-"

"I've been taking care of her almost her entire life, so Cynthia has no  _right_ to-"

I heard someone slamming something against wood. It was probably their foot, because it sounded out low. I picked up that tip from Papa. "You aren't even her real parent, you Jap! You don't even look like her, you two aren't even the same race, and yet you claim to be the parent when there's no blood? Her  _actual_ father is an Englishman, which she is, and you aren't. You are just a pathetic man who wants to amalgamate and aspire to what he can never be. She may have been an enemy spy, but so are you!  _That's_ why I'm not stopping her from picking up her daughter. Because she was a simple woman, and you are some pathetic foreigner who dream of becoming part of what he can never be-"

"Then I quit! You can't keep me here if the whole reason why I've poured my blood for you is to be given away!" I heard Papa stomping before I heard the door open and him say "Now if you will get out! My daughter is to return home soon."

As that guy left, I walked away to another room. I wanted to walk to Papa and say that I just got home, but I couldn't. I felt sad, and sleepy, and sick. I went to my bed and wondered how Papa could possibly not be my father. We look similar, and yet even my classmates' parents look more like me than Papa does. What's an assassin? What's an adoption? What is a "Jap"? How am I English? Who is my "real" father? If I never met him, is he still my father? And why can he even be considered my father?

I went to sleep where I didn't do much resting before I woke up. That man called my father a spy. An enemy spy. My mother as well.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> That turned out differently then expected. Here's where I got inspiration for the house: https://www.google.com/imgres?imgurl=https://68.media.tumblr.com/f78fc985ab5bd05a85c75009d39d6825/tumblr_o9jajd0PzB1rrv2z0o1_500.jpg&imgrefurl=https://www.tumblr.com/tagged/amari-joker-game&h=275&w=500&tbnid=KkS1fU6SbAm8oM:&tbnh=166&tbnw=303&usg=__DSmZSa6cCgUSWEumW95VDGXWBfU%3D&vet=1&docid=xy6A21d61U7FwM
> 
> The person who drew it is not me.


	4. Calm after the storm

The next morning, I felt groggy, even though I went to bed as soon as I got home. I brushed my teeth, got dressed, and then went to the kitchen to eat breakfast and feed Frate. Papa was sitting at the table, and smoking a cigarette. He also looked tired. "Papa", I asked, wondering whether he was really my Papa or a liar "Why are you smoking?" Papa looked down and crushed it with his hands before tossing it in the trash can. "Didn't that hurt a lot?" I never understood how people could put out flames with their fingers in movies. It always looked like it would hurt. Maybe it does hurt, if only a little, and they don't say anything.

"Not really" Papa says softly. "Not that much." Papa moved to the sink to wash his hands while I asked about breakfast. Usually, Papa has already made breakfast and is waiting to have me eat with him. "I haven't thought about breakfast. I don't know how we are going to aff- I mean, get breakfast this late?"

"You could cook for me, like you always do."

"Yeah... I do need to talk to my boss as soon as I can."

"Did you get fired?"

Papa's eyes widened. "Why do you think... Hauun" he said, sighing. "You figured it out because of my sad appearance and me wondering out loud whether we could afford breakfast."

 _I heard you yesterday, so I thought that they would fire you for yelling and saying that you would quit._  I didn't want to lie, so instead I said "What's your job?"

Papa looked surprised at that, but then he quickly said "My job was... my job is... getting people to join our company."

 _Is that what a real life spy does?_  "What does your company do?"

"Information."

"What kind of information?"

"Information about other countries."

 _That's sounds like something a spy would do._ _Are those countries allied, or not?_ Wait a moment, the war has ended, so would a spy still be active? Shouldn't he have lost his job by now? And even if he weren't a spy, he still wouldn't have a job because the war is over. So...  _Was that weird guy wrong after all? I guess so. But then, why didn't Papa correct him? He did get mad at him, so was that it instead? ..._ I really don't know what's going on.

I was about to ask Papa, but I noticed that he was already cooking breakfast. I... shouldn't disturb him. Papa's busy enough. I fed Frate as Papa was cooking, and by the time I washed my hands, I saw a plate of steaming hot eggs and bacon. That's my favorite breakfast, other than pancakes and ice cream, or waffles and ice cream, but I only get those on my birthday.

I looked up at Papa and he said "I don't want you to be cranky and tired because of breakfast. I want you to be happy, and to see you be happy as often as I can."

 _Papa, am I moving away? Is Cynthia going to "adopt" me? What does adoption mean?_ I wanted to ask Papa that, but I know that he would be suspicious. Papa is very good at noticing things, even when he's playing around with me. _But if he won't tell me what his job is, then why would he tell me if someone's going to take me away, or if he's a spy? If he won't tell me... Then maybe he really is a spy?_

"Emma, you haven't eaten your breakfast."

I still felt groggy, so I drank some water, but now my tummy feels bad. "I feel sick, Papa."

"It's probably just due to the recent news."

"Why did you quit your job?" I wanted to know if maybe it had something to do with Papa being a spy. Papa was called an enemy spy, so maybe they were black mailing him? But what could they be blackmailing him with?

"Because they wanted me to give up something important, and I just couldn't do that."

"What was that important thing?" Was it top secret information? Treasure? Did he mention it in the conversation yesterday? Because I forgot some of it. "Was it expensive?"

"No, it's not expensive at all."

"So it's not a diamond, or secret plans for a war plane?"

"What sort of detective would have those things?" Papa petted my head, and encouraged me to eat my breakfast before he paced around the house. By the time I finished, Papa came to ask me what he was going to do. "I don't know. Maybe it involved Frate, or the mail or something." Papa teaches me a lot of cool tricks, like how you know someone in interested in something. If you mention certain words, and read people's reactions to them, then it tells you a little bit of what's going on. Though maybe one of my uncles taught me _that_ trick. _Maybe I should ask them about Papa_.

Anyway, Papa changed his face when he heard "mail", so it probably had something to do with the letter from two days ago. As I left, Papa was on the phone. I think that he was calling his boss. Probably to talk about his job, and Cynthia, and something big like a diamond. Why else would he quit over it?

 _Oh no, I mentioned that he quit when he said fired! Papa will figure out that I overheard his conversation!_ If I were my uncles, they would go through everything really well. They're good at tricking people, and are even proud of it. Though they don't want me to tell Papa about any of it.

If they are really Papa's brothers, then they should know Papa. And even if they don't, then they still care about him because they watch over me. I think that I'll ask them. Even if I have to travel alone to do it.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I hope that the voice hasn't changed too much. I hope that it's still enjoyable. Hopefully, I'll make an exciting next chapter, and we might even hear about a spy or two.


	5. Our maiden Cora plans a meeting

The first thing I needed was to find out where my uncles lived. They all seem to live in different places, but I don’t know too much where because Papa only invites them here when they watch over me, and when Papa went away the last two times, he hired a caretaker to watch over me. Though three times ago, when I turned seven, he took me with him. I don’t know the name of the cities that we went to, but it was very pretty. It was some sort of island, and after we left, General MacArthur went there, and there was this HUGE fight. It ended up in the newspapers. Papa says that I’m not allowed to talk about it because his boss wouldn’t be happy. Oh yeah, the island was called Leyte. I remember that because the newspapers called what happened with MacArthur the “Battle of Leyte”.

It was there that I heard about uncle Miyoshi for the first time. There was this big kid who my Papa seemed to know, and they all of a sudden they got dark when they talked about Miyoshi. Maybe he was an uncle of mine? I wonder what happened to him. I think that they said something about some guy named Sakuma, who seems to be a boss to the older boy, and my other uncles. Maybe they aren’t my uncles, but just my Papa’s fellow spies. But Miyoshi seemed to not be with them anymore, so he might not be a spy. I remembered that they said that Sakuma lived on the mainland, so I can’t talk to Miyoshi through Sakuma. There is another uncle of mine who also lives on Hawaii Island.

He has brown hair, and picks me up whenever he sees me. Sometimes, he gives me piggyback rides. Papa calls him Kaminaga when they think that I can’t hear them. Otherwise, he calls him “Uncle Keiji”. He lives in Hilo, while we live in Kailua-Kono, which are on the opposite sides of the island.

I don’t know how to get there, so maybe Papa has his phone number? It’s worth a try.That’s why I came home earlier than usual to get to home. I immediately went to Papa’s office to try to find any phone numbers, or apartment addresses. Instead, I found the letter from Cynthia, and some letter from a guy with a Japanese name. Maybe it says that Papa’s a spy? I felt noxious after I thought that. I really don’t want Papa to be a bad guy. I opened the letter, and it said something about how a guy named Sakuma would come briefly before leaving for Japan. _Can I ask him about about Papa? Would he be honest if I asked him? There's only one way to find out, and that would be to ask him. What day does he say that he’ll come?_

Two weeks and five days. That means it’ll be on Saturday. When he’s done, he’s going to leave on a boat to Japan. Why Japan? Is it because he has a Japanese last name? Oh, I wish that I were a detective. Maybe I could get that brown round hat and that curly thing that you put in mouth, so I could be better at this. If this were a movie, what would be the correct thing to do? I don’t think that I saw a movie like this before, but maybe it turns out that Papa’s not a spy, but really pretending to be one? … Nah, that makes no sense. There’s no reason to pretend to be a spy, because Papa isn’t trying to make a lady fall in love with him, and pretending to be something that you’re not is too spy-like. So definitely no.

All I have to do is talk to Sakuma before he leaves for Japan. Cynthia arrives one week on the dot later, and… I really don’t want her to take me away. Maybe if Papa is a spy… but if Papa is, then she is as well. So what about my “real” father? What happened to him?

Is anything going to happy anymore? ...

Maybe it will if Papa's still a good guy.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for the boring exposition chapter, as well as publishing a new chapter only now. I didn't have much access to a computer, and this chapter exists only to explain what Emma will do next, and other things that happen later in the story. The next one will be more interesting, and come quicker.  
> Also, Cora is Persephone's name before she because Persephone. Cora means "maiden". To continue tying it to "The theft of Persephone".


	6. Frazzled

When he settled back into his study after a long and humiliating meeting, Amari couldn’t really remember when he opened that letter from Sakuma. It was opened, and the first thing one could see on his desk, but he didn’t really remember opening it.

Nor did he really care, if he were truly honest with himself (though after a lifetime of lying, could he actually be honest with anyone?) He just felt way too damn tired and defeated to care. His new boss (would every boss after Yuuki forever just be his “new” boss? For how long would continue even working as a spy?), took the entire time to play with him, by saying that he didn’t have to take him back, but maybe if he really proved himself, he could just manage to keep his job.

But not his daughter. Not the only person in the world he would kill for. Because honestly, he didn’t know whether he didn’t murder because he genuinely found it appalling, he couldn’t bring himself to do it, just as a formality, to be able to fully abandon his past, or perhaps just because he couldn’t bear to look into those cute blue eyes of hers, and say _Papa’s a murderer_. Perhaps that was all that was stopping him. It would probably embarrass his targets for them to know that a little girl who doesn’t even know the definition of murder is the reason why they are alive. Or perhaps something more embarrassing would be that an old man like him, who would lose his daughter, was the one threatening them in the first place.

Anyway, back to the letter- he briefly thought about how Emma would say that she got her absentmindedness from him before trying to discard that thought-- why was Sakuma coming over? He read over the letter again, and it seemed to be that he was going to see all of them before leaving for Japan. He didn’t really know why Sakuma wanted to go to Japan. Yes, Sakuma probably grew up in the most traditionally Japanese household, and was probably the the one most tied to how everyone thought there, so maybe he would want to see his friends… But still, it seemed strange that this country’s advisor on the Japanese military would want to go to the place where he could only spy on his friends. And even then, it wouldn’t be pleasant considering that most of his army acquaintances tried to run him off, with the rest dying in battle. So there was probably another reason for it.

It probably had something to do with “that man”. So either Yuuki had some reason to send Sakuma there, or perhaps it had something to do with Miyoshi’s memory. Either way, it seemed less like a brief stint that would last months or a few years being undercover, and more like a permanent trip. Which, again would make no sense, because if Sakuma just wanted to see what Japan was now like, or observe its growth, he could just ask to be assigned as a handler. Of course, maybe they wouldn’t trust a Japanese spy reporting to a Japanese handler. Despite the many, many times that Amari himself asked, he couldn’t be assigned as a handler enough to his liking. They wanted him to prove his work as a genuine asset. Forgetting, of course, that he could also do that by offering to train their spies, and that the D Agency spies worked best with each other.

He needed a drink. But he didn’t want to be drunk while watching Emma, so for now, grape juice, and later, sake with Sakuma. … If sake production has resumed.

It will be a hell of a long time before things return to normal, if they ever will.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Next chapter will probably have them meet Sakuma.


	7. Stormy night, and falling snow

In this sleepy haze of smoke where things took forever, when they were finally done, it was almost a month later. He really hated this. He dreaded the day that Sakuma would come because it would mean that Cynthia would come a week later to pick up her daughter (Amari tried his best to avoid using Emma’s name, even in his thoughts. It would just make things even more painful). He didn’t know what he wanted to do with his life, and although he had aspirations of being an author, everything just felt like work, and worthless, and stale- like bread so dry it would choke you as you tried to swallow it, scratching the skin of your throat.

No matter how much sleep he received, he still felt barely rested, and no matter what he did, he felt like there was nothing that he could do.

* * *

Papa seems very tired, and I don’t know why. I asked him if he’s been staying up late, and he says no, but he seems unhappy, and has bags under his eyes. He also drinks more coffee. He also spends more time at his office, writing things and calling people, as well as going to his work place thing a lot. Where he does work, I think.  _ Do spies go to offices? Does this prove that he isn’t a spy? _

So it’s the night before Sakuma is to come, and we are eating dinner. Except, I just noticed that Papa isn’t eating. I look at his plate, and then his face. Papa looks at me, and even though he’s smiling, he looks very tired. Not like how I look when I’m smiling and tired when Papa takes photos of me at Christmas, or other good days. Papa looks like he wants to sleep because he’s sad (I don’t really understand that though).

“Emmy, I’m going to have a friend come over tomorrow-”

“What’s his name?”

“His name is Uncle Tomokazu. I am having him over tomorrow, but I want you to be on a boat to Uncle Keiji’s.”

“Okay… What- WHY?”

“Why are you so upset?”  _ Because I know that Keiji is spy if you are one, and won’t tell me. No, shouldn’t Sakuma be their boss? But if that’s true, then… _

“Are you hiding something from me? Is that why you don’t want me here when you talk to Sakuma?”

Papa paled. He pauses briefly before his eyes look like fire. “Why did you call him Sakuma?” He clenches his hands so they’re as hard as his face. Something is shaking terribly inside of me. “His name is Uncle Tomokazu.”

The silence is so scary because I know that it can only end badly. I want it to end quickly so I can stop feeling scared, but also for it to go on so I don’t get punished. I am about to lie to my Papa before he says “Emma”.  _ I’m in big trouble, aren’t I? _

“Ye-es Papa?”

“Did you open my letter?”

If I say no, he’ll say I’m lying. If I say yes, he’ll still stay angry. “... Why do you ask?”

“... Emma, you know that I love you, right? And that I raised you to be kind and honest, right?” He said all of this through gritted teeth with a strained voice. I put my head down.

“Ye-yes?”

“If I did all of that so you wouldn’t be a liar, then why did you lie and say that you didn’t know who Sakuma was?”

“... But I never said that. I only looked at your letter.”

“And why did you look through my letter?”

Why did I look at Papa’s letter? Because… "I want to know what's going on, but you won't tell me. Because even when I ask you, you won't tell me. Why?"

Papa looked at me with his eyes slightly wide, but very sad. It was almost a whisper when he said "Because I don't want to lose you. Because I love you, and if I tell you, I'll lose you."

Papa pushed back his chair when I said "But I'll always love you, because you're my Papa."

He didn't look up, and only stood up to take his dish to the kitchen. Then, as he was about to leave for his bedroom, I thought that I heard him say something, except it made no sense. Even when I went to sleep, I went over those words in my mind like it was stone that revealed a diamond if you rubbed it enough. Because Papa said "Even though I'm not your father?"

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Next chapter will have us see Emma making a certain mistake, Sakuma talking to Amari, and Amari finally deciding how to deal with his Emma/Cynthia/custody battle, though it may be either an extra long chapter, or just two chapters. Stay tuned! Also, thank you all for the lovely comments. They make me feel happy. I hope that all of you have a lovely day!


	8. The beginning of the first winter

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is going to be a three page long chapter, but something exciting happens at the end.

“You know, I don’t understand why you don’t just tell her that you’re a spy. You told her that you were one when you just brought her into D Agency.” Sakuma and Amari were at the kitchen table; Amari had one hand supporting his face with his left arm resting on the table near his face and elbow. Sakuma had just came back from retrieving something from his black car, and looked at him with a look of mild amusement and disconcernment. “She’ll love you regardless.”

“It’s not just that I used to be an enemy spy, but that I’m not her real father, only someone who just took her in.”

“So a man who raises a child with care and love isn’t a father?”

“I’m her Papa, but not the father of the child. That would be Raymond Grane-”

“He’s dead, and has been for many years.”

Amari didn’t respond, only making a small whine in the back of his throat while Sakuma went to the stove. He didn’t say that it didn’t matter that Raymond Grane was dead, because Cynthia wasn’t, and since he wasn’t the true father, Emma would be angry at this stranger who was a foreign spy for taking her away. It was only when Amari noticed Sakuma putting on his apron did he say anything. “I’m not so useless as to have a guest cook for me just because I’m in a mood.”

“I didn’t think you were. I just thought that it would cheer you up to have some homemade Tamagoyaki.” Sakuma smiled as he said that. It was a genuine Sakuma smile, as Miyoshi would’d said.

It made him think of Miyoshi who would say how tiring and childish Sakuma was, and yet never wanting him to change, as well as Kaminaga, who could always lighten up the mood whenever anyone was sad, even though he wasn’t such a happy-go-lucky playboy that a few of them believed him to be. He was the one most shaken after everything that happened to them all, though he hid it the best. Amari also thought of Fukumoto, who would usually be the one who cooked for them. In exchange, they did some of his chores, and didn’t piss off the man who could put nasty things in their food.

Amari thought of D Agency, and how at first, things weren’t quite so happy with Odagiri disappearing (is Fukumoto still searching for him? Can’t he just accept that the man has probably turned into a corpse?), things got worse still when Miyoshi died, and even worse when they had to flee. That was when he stopped telling Emma stories about him being a spy. Because it was then that he realized that if he died, Emma would be all alone, and that his job only made her more vulnerable. He hated that feeling. It made him feel weak, useless, worthless. For what worth do you have if you are weak? If you are weak, then you can’t do anything.

It was only later that he found out some of the things that his former country did. Even though he didn’t help in their planning or engineering, he still felt sick to his stomach at the atrocities that that country had committed (it seems like Japan will always be “that country” in his head).

Anyway… What was he thinking again? “Sakuma san, what was I saying again?”

“I see that you got lost in your thoughts again?”

“A little, but it’s not like I do it a lot.”

“Yeah, I noticed that you only do it in ‘safe’ locations. That’s some food for thought.” Sakuma laid down some Tamagoyaki on plate in front of Amari. “Here’s some actual food as well.”

“Thanks, Sakuma san” Amari said, lifting himself to an upright position to look at Sakuma properly, and then at his food. It wasn’t quite the Tamagoyaki he would serve to Emma, but it still looked delicious. Taking a bite only confirmed it. “Sakuma san… Thank you.”

“You can say that it’s delicious, you know. It’s not like there’s anything to be embarrassed about.” Yeah, everyone at the D Agency was pretty cosmopolitan, and if _Sakuma_ was fine with something, then that meant that probably everyone else was as well.

“I wasn’t thinking that you were like a woman because of your cooking skills, everyone at D Agency can-”

“No, I meant relying on others. As well as complementing my cooking, because I do have some skills in some things. I’m not just hapless Sakuma” he said, smiling.

“Yeah, I expected you to be more distraught about everything that happened.” Sakuma _was_ distraught about the army chasing them out of that country, but surprisingly blase about Miyoshi’s death. At first, he seemed sad, but then it was just like he forgot about it. Sort of how he always imagined that a strong man would handle trauma. Now, he finally realized that if someone’s like that, then they are a little bit inhuman, not a strong person.

Sakuma lost his smile. Then he sighed and said “Well, some things are just what they are, while others are not.”

“Did you get that from a fortune cookie?”

Sakuma smiled a crooked and nervous smile that barely held happiness. “No. I just thought… Where’s Emma?”

“In her bedroom. I tried waking her up, but she seems too groggy to go. I was supposed to drive her there in a black car, but now that she’s just sleeping, it seems that I bought the ticket for no reason. A waste of money when my budget is as tight as it is.”

Sakuma was no longer smiling. “If your situation is that bad, you could’d told us. We would be happy to help.”

“We’re self sufficient, Sakuma san, so there’s no need to be dependant-”

“There’s a difference between dependence and just getting a little bit of help when you’re in a tight spot. I’m pretty sure that if you just asked Yuuk-”

“Don’t.” Amari didn’t want to be reminded of the anger, guilt, and shame that he felt towards his former boss. “I want to put that part of my life behind me. That’s why I want to leave the spy trade as soon as I can.”

“Is it also why you never talk to us unless you can’t get a babysitter for Emma? Because we still care about you, AND your family. If you just let us in-”

“Then I’ll never move away from my past.”

“Which is still your present.”

Amari stood up, abandoning the food in front of him to walk out of the room. Sakuma took that as a cue to leave. Amari briefly looked through the window at Sakuma’s already opened car, and then quickly turned away. He didn’t want to think about how he rudely dismissed his friend, because, well, he did feel like a jerk about it, and wanted to apologize already. However, it was, in his mind, too small a slight to make too much noise over, and if he did so, then he would look pathetic and lonely. Because it only just occurred to him that not talking to anyone as an equal and a friend was pretty damn lonely. Quietly, he decided to check on Emma, hoping that saying sorry to someone, anyone, and explaining his feelings would make his heart feel less heavy.

The bed was empty.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Winter came in the myth when Persephone's parent abandoned their duties to search for their daughter. Don't worry, she's not dead or kidnapped.


	9. Lost, but safe

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for posting this late at night. Ran into some external problems. Oh well. I'm sorry. Have a lovely night!

I remember going to the black car that Papa said would take me to Uncle Keiji’s. I remember falling asleep in the back of the car. I remember going on the boat, and saying that I am supposed to be on there to get to my Uncle Keiji. I don’t remember when I figured out that I was on the boat to Japan. I do remember looking for someone that I could recognize, because I only had a toy dolphin and even Frate wasn’t with me, and feeling very scared and alone. It felt as if the sky itself would wrap around me cause me to fall forever through it. I also remember trying not cry. I failed.

“Whose child is that?”

“Whoever she is, she can’t make a scene like that.”

“Someone call an employee and find her parent!”

“Uugh, hanhhn, uugh. PAPA! Paa-paaa!!! Papa!”

“Emma! Is that you? What are you doing here? Why are you even on this boat?” I didn’t feel too happy when I heard that because I knew that it wasn’t Papa, but when I saw Uncle Sakuma’s face, my heart felt heavy, and it was like steel covered and lined my tummy. I looked down and continued crying.

“Papa, I want my Papa.” Sakuma picked me up and rested my head against his shoulder. “Please… I want my Papa.” Sakuma rubbed his hand against my back, and although it felt nice and calming, I wanted my Papa to be doing that, so I remember trying to escape from his hold, until a uniform man came and asked me what was wrong. “I-I got o-on the w-wrong boat, and n-now my Papa’s in Hawaii, and I can’t back to hi-hi-im. Ugh hwa hwa-hwa!”

“It’s okay, little girl, we’ll send a telegraph to him so he can come pick you up. He’ll come get you really soon. But until then, do you want to stay with this man?”

As I was about to answer, my mind brought me back to another time when the same thing happened. Except my mama was missing, not my Papa, and it was Papa who comforted me. I was scared because I hadn’t seen mama since yesterday when a boat arrived, and I was all alone with no one but Frate. _But you’re not alone, miss Emma; you have me. I’ll be your new papa._ Ohhh. Papa.

It was then that I noticed that we were in a room with a weird machine, and Uncle Sakuma asked me if I wanted to add anything to the message that they were going to send to Papa. “I-I didn’t mean to leave, an-and that I want him to back soon. … With Frate!” I was so alone that I didn’t even have Frate with me. For my entire life, I’ve always had Frate as a companion. But now, even Frate is far away. I started to cry again before Sakuma started to rub my head. Papa rubs my head. Only Papa can rub my head like that. “Stop it” I said as I blocked his free arm. “You’re not my Papa!”

“I know that I’m not, but your Papa would want me to take care of you, and keep you happy, wouldn’t he?”

“Well, yeah.”

Uncle Sakuma smiled. “Well then, I guess that I have to do so.”

I found myself smiling until I realized something. “So you’re only doing this because you have to?”

Sakuma released me, and I stood up on the floor to look at him. “When will Papa come?”

It was the captain who replied. “Travel between Hawaii and Japan is sporadic, and expensive enough that we can’t ferry a little girl all by herself just to return her to her father, so while the journey itself is incredibly short, it should a bit of time before she can get a boat.”

“How long?” I asked, trying to fight away the tears that would come if it was something like a month or even a year. _I really wanted to spend my birthday with you, Papa_.

Uncle Sakuma responded. “The longest will be a week. I remember that there is to be a brief shipment of supplies and servicemen from Hawaii to Japan, and back again. Your Papa will be here soon.”

I wiped my eyes, and then the captain said that the ship was approaching land. Uncle Sakuma held out his hand and I grabbed it, scared of being alone more than of Sakuma being a spy. When we finally reached land Uncle Sakuma scanned the part as if looking for something before smiling and trying to hurry down. When we got there, I saw a man with red hair and brown eyes off in the corner. His hair was combed prettily, and he was wearing really nice clothing. He looked down at me and said something. When I finally managed to open my mouth, all I could manage was “You look pretty handsome.”

“... Thanks. Who is she?”

“Emma, Amari’s daughter.”

“Oh yes. I guess that means that I’m her uncle.”

“Can’t I be your girlfriend?” He looked directly at me with a kind smile, so I hid behind Uncle Sakuma. Papa says I'm bashful, but I'm not.

The nice and pretty man poked his head around him and said “While I would love to, I am afraid that your father wouldn’t approve. I already have a special someone, and your father must want to keep you all to himself.”

Yeah, that was probably true. When I was little, I wanted to marry Papa, but now I know that I can’t do that, because Papa is too Papa and old. I also don't love him like someone I want to marry. This guy looks handsome and pretty, though. I already like-like him. “Who’s your special someone?”

His eyes lit up, and half of his face turned into a smile, like a cat’s. “That for you to find out and never tell.” Then the red haired man turned to Uncle Sakuma and said “Why is Amari’s child here?”

“She got on the wrong boat because I also drove a black car. She was told to go into a black car that would take her to a boat, but she entered my car by mistake, so now we have a up to a week to kill before Amari comes.”

“I hope that he knows that it was an accident, otherwise... “ And then he whistled.

“Yeah” said Sakuma, scratching his back. “I wouldn’t want to be there.”

“Why do you want Papa to know that I came here by accident?” Both of the looked at me in confusion before Uncle Sakuma said “Because if he thought that we tried to kidnap you, he would be really angry. He’s really protective of you.”

“Really?”

“Yes, one time, when you were much younger, a grown man with a gun wanted to come into the room that you were sleeping in, and man, did Amari-” The pretty man poked my Uncle. He looked at me weirdly, and said “Yeah, well, I shouldn't mention that in front of kids. Anyway, do you have the keys, Miyoshi?”

So this guy is Miyoshi? “I didn’t know that you were Miyoshi! Are you a spy?”

“Let’s talk about it at home.” So Miyoshi, Uncle Sakuma, and me walked to their car. Along the way, I saw a lot of people who looked really sick and hungry. I have a candy bar in my pocket, and I felt bad about not giving it to them. When we finally arrived, I asked if I could give them my candy bar when we would come back.

“Those people are going to be fed, but it takes a long time for the body to recover from starvation”, said Miyoshi.

“What’s starvation?”

“It’s when you haven’t eaten in awhile. It’s really unpleasant, so we shouldn’t talk about it." Soon, it was time for dinner, and all of us ate, and I think that I saw Miyoshi kiss Uncle Sakuma, but that makes no sense because because Sakuma isn’t pretty enough for Miyoshi. _I’m MUCH prettier than him. Why doesn’t Miyoshi marry me? _ Afterwards, I went to sleep on an unfamiliar bed, but since I dreamed that I was playing with Frate and Papa, I slept peacefully that night.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry about the SakuMiyo, I couldn't resist. Also, I hope that I didn't peeve you about this most recent development. I'm sorry if I did.


	10. Taking care

“I can’t believe, I just can’t believe it.”

“Well, it wasn’t as if she was kidnapped” said Kaminaga as he watched Amari pace. “She just got lost, and will come back in a week.”

“But I don’t have a week! Cynthia while be here in a week, and if the only thing that she knows of me is that I lost her daughter, then she won’t let me keep her.”

“Your daughter,  **your** daughter. Not Mrs. Grane’s  daughter.”

“Emma and I aren’t blood.”

“No, you two are bound by something tighter.”

“What?” Amari asked, snapping his head at Kaminaga, who was looking like he was in mild life-threatening danger.

“Love, and parenthood.” Even though Kaminaga said it calmly, it seemed that he yelled if you judged it only from Amari’s reaction.

“I told you; Cynthia’s the parent, and if Emma was able to forget about her mother-”

“Emma won’t forget about you. She doesn’t want to forget about you. All she knows about parenthood comes from you.”

“Yeah, but-”.

Kaminaga hushed him and said “Besides, moping around won’t do anything. The least that you can do should be to get information on the next boat to Japan, and packing up everything you need.”

Amari stood silent for a couple of seconds, contemplating this until he said “Should I take Frate with me? Emma asked to see Frate.”

“Ye...yeah. You should take her dog along. Children love puppies, after all.”

“Frate is as old as Emma, so he’s not a puppy anymore. I think that he has about a decade left.”

Kaminaga was about to say something about how children (probably) grow out of love right at that age when Frate rushed up to Amari and barked. “I think that he wants his mistress.”

“I have to agree with that” muttered Amari as he picked up Frate and walked to Emma’s room. He would only be in Japan briefly, but it would do good to pick up some of her clothes and toys. As well as money and food to pay for Sakuma taking care of her. Because even if Sakuma refused, saying that it was merely the right thing to do, he wanted to show his appreciation. Because even though he wasn’t the father, he loved Emma genuinely. And he hoped that Cynthia would appreciate this, at the very least.


	11. The storm is calming

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you guys for all the support! I wish you merry times to all of you, and I apologizes for not updating yesterday. Sad to say this, but the story will end soon. I don't know what to write after this, so I'll try thinking. Anyway, I hope that you enjoy this.

Japan seems pretty nice. The plants and people are pretty, and the buildings that are destroyed are being rebuilt, and the people there are very nice. Miyoshi says that I should stop giving them my food, but they look so hungry, and I really want them to be happy.

I don’t think that Miyoshi is too happy though. He looks a little pale, but seems upset that I’m here. I asked Uncle Sakuma if that was true, and he said “Well, he was expecting only me, and wanted to spend time with me only.”

“Why?”

“Because I love him, and he loves me, and we, as adults, wanted to do _adult_ things together.”

“Oh… You mean… Like, play Mahjong, or talk about politics?” I heard someone make a weird sound, which I would later learn was a snort, and I looked around, but couldn’t see where it came from. I looked at Uncle Sakuma, and he had a weird look on his face. I think that his ears were pink.

“Well, I guess you could say that we wanted to play with each other, yes. But also to just talk and catch up on each other’s lives. You know, have intimacy. Do you know what intimacy means?”

“Nope” I said as I shook my head.

“Well, intimacy is, you know, being close to someone, and it’s sorta a one on one thing. Miyoshi couldn’t be intimate with anyone for a long time, and that’s because-”

“He was a spy?” I asked. Uncle Sakuma gave me a fearful expression before quickly changing it. But not quickly enough. “Were you not as good as a spy as Papa, because Papa changes his face more quickly?”

“How did you… Did Amari tell-”

“She’s Amari’s child, so of course she would pick these things up. Even though they’re not blood, she’s still a spy’s daughter.” I turned around and saw Miyoshi.

My face fell. “So Papa’s really a spy?”

“He is indeed” said Miyoshi as he crouched down to my height. “He’s one of the eight best spies in the world.”

“Really?”

“Yes. I heard however, that while he used to work for Japan, he now works for America. And do you know why?”

“Na-uh” I said as I once again shook my head. I did it with my eyes closed, so I didn’t noticed that I was lifted up I opened them.

“Because he loves you.”

“Re… Really? How come?”

“Emma”, Uncle Sakuma said as he walked over and looked at me “When you love someone, you want to do anything to make them happy. You want to spend time with them. Being with them makes you happy.”

“I feel like that when I’m with Papa.”

“He feels the same as well. That’s why he’s been trying to quit being a spy; he’s afraid of dying and losing you.”

“Papa can die?!” All of a sudden, I got really small, and even though Miyoshi was holding me, I still felt cold.

“Your Papa’s one of the best spies in the business, so it would take a lot to kill him” said Miyoshi before putting me down. “Though sometimes all it takes is an accident to end things. Accidents that could happen even if he weren’t a spy." Miyoshi started to touch a spot on his chest for some reason.

“So how come Papa’s still a spy?”

“It’s a long story” Uncle Sakuma started to explain, before Miyoshi said that it would be resolved very soon.

“How?” I asked. Uncle Sakuma looked confused as well.

Miyoshi smiled a smile that a cat would give if they could. Like the Cheshire cat from Alice in Wonderland. “I’m sure that we can pull a few strings. After all, Yuuki is still owed some favors.”

Uncle Sakuma smiled a smile that was a little bit weird, and then he said “By way, what would you like for dinner?”, and the conversation ended.

Hopefully, Cynthia won’t take me away.


	12. The Return of Spring

As he waited for the boat to land in Japan, Amari had never been more nervous in his life. Carrying bags of Emma’s clothes and toys (as well as holding Frate’s leash), Amari was nervous that the last time he would see his daughter would be painful, with her rebuking him for lying about her parentage. Honestly, he couldn’t say that he didn’t deserve it. He did lie to Emma a lot. About his job, his ethnicity at times, who he really was, and who her actual father was. To him, it didn’t matter that he raised Emma for years versus Cynthia becoming an assassin to get revenge during those two or three years, because he raised Emma with the quality of honesty in mind, and he just knew who Emma would pick.

Though if he could do it all over again… he would just admit that he wasn’t the father. He only said he was because he thought it would be easier…. No, that’s not why. It was probably harder than him just passing himself off as an uncle. No. He did it because…. Because...

Because he truly wanted to be her father. Because if he had one wish, it was to be Emma’s father, not a spy.

“Everyone, prepare for docking! We are about to dock in Japan” said the captain. Amari looked towards the land in front of him, and he could already see his jumping seven year-old girl.

 _Why does she look so happy to see me?_ He thought, confused but smiling.

As he was about to leave someone said “Here you go”, and tried to hand him something. Amari looked at what was in the boat worker’s hand: a stuffed dolphin.

“Emma…”

“The little red haired girl left it here. I knew that you were the father, so, here you go.” Amari put down one of the bags and received the toy. He was about to say that he wasn’t really the father before a precious little someone shouted the word “Papa!” repeatedly.

“Emma!” he said before she threw herself into his arms. He dropped the other bag to the floor and Frate escaped to meet his mistress. This meant he could lift her up and hug her. _Ah, this brings back memories._

“Hello, Emma’s dad.” Amari briefly looked away from his lovely daughter to see Sakuma. _He must not know how to address me in front of Emma._

“Hello Uncle Sakuma. I want to thank you for taking care of my daughter. Here, I have some things to give you.”

As he sadly put Emma down to grab the bag of treats and money, it wasn’t Sakuma who said “No, it’s really fine, she wasn’t a hassle”, but someone who he thought was long gone.

“Mi-Miyoshi? Is that you?” _No, it can’t be, I read the report on Miyoshi myself, so the train accident couldn’t have been…_ He turned around. He had no idea why his eyes were stinging.

“Why did you read the report? If no one knew, then they couldn’t mourn for a man who was alive.” Miyoshi was wearing a rare smile, but it was more bitter than happy. He was also wearing a blue hakama and a light red Haori.

“I see that you truly have been relaxing around this time.”

“Not as much as you think. Emma has been keeping us busy after all. Not that she any trouble, mind you.”

“She even has small crush on Miyoshi” Sakuma whispered into Amari’s ear. “It was so precious.”

“I wouldn’t even dream of doing anything, though” Miyoshi quickly stated, a little bit of fear escaping from his impassive mask. “Especially since she’s not even ten.”

“I’m turning eight soon!” Emma quickly countered. It was incredibly cute to Amari how she thought that it would make even a slight amount of difference.

“I know that silly, that’s why Sakuma and me are going to send you something extra special for birthday.” And to finish it off, he even kissed her forehead, sending her into a dizzy excitement. Cradle robbing bastard. Did he have to get her into boys _this_ early? “Anyway, I think that your Papa misses you a lot, so please play with him.” Emma turned around to face him, and it probably would have been one of the happiest moments of his life if not for the fact that he would lose her soon. After all, her mother was just-

“Yes, please!” she said as she tried her best to tackle him. “I missed you so much, Papa. I’m so sorry for leaving, I didn’t mean to get on the wrong boat! I’m sorry, Papa!” Tears were beginning to form in her eyes, so Amari couldn’t help but pet her head and comfort her, even though Cynthia was right around-

“I understand” said a female voice in a British accent. Cynthia. Amari was so distracted, that he didn’t get to explain that he brought Emma’s things with him so she could leave with Cynthia. But now-

“Who are you?” asked Emma, staring at Cynthia.

“I’m your mummy” replied the older woman.

“So you’re Cynthia?”

“... I see.” she said softly, but dejectedly. Amari could tell that it broke her heart to see that her own flesh and blood wouldn’t even recognize her.It would break his heart utterly as well. “I’m… sorry for all the trouble that I caused, I just wanted to.. I wanted to see Emma again.”  
“I can visit you, you know. I just want to live with Papa, is all.”

Cynthia looked towards Amari without really seeing him. “Yes. Yes, that would be for the best. I understand.”

“You can schedule a visit anytime you want, just… please-”

“I understand” said Cynthia, firm and soft spoken. She grabbed her suitcase like she was about to leave before setting it down and stroking Emma’s head. Then she hugged her and said “I love you” before grabbing her suitcase again and going under the deck.

Emma smiled at Amari and said “I never want to leave you, Papa. I’m glad that I have a momma now, but I’m even happier that I have you!”

Amari smiled, stroking the hair from her eyes before saying “Me too.”


	13. Happy Days

Allowing himself a lazy smile, Amari realized that he hadn’t been this content in a long time. He was lying down in a hammock with his little girl in his arms ( _his_ daughter, _his_ precious little girl, _his_ beloved little daughter), their dog on his legs, a blanket over them, and a plate of snacks he made on a side table near them.

Best of all was that he no longer had to worry about his living situation: his boss took him back and gave him the task of training spies so he wouldn’t be in life threatening danger, away from Emma for months, or any of the usual drawbacks of being a spy, his daughter was safely and firmly in his custody ( _legal_ custody, he just couldn’t be happier), and he finally allowed himself to see his former fellow spies regularly (Emma loved playing with her many uncles, he couldn’t believe that he used to deprive her of them). Not to mention that it was great to talk to people that he had known for some time about the things that he had gone through.

It was also great that Miyoshi was alive, and although Yuuki never told them otherwise, they really did think that he died (perhaps they should not had read the report that Yuuki tried to hide from them. Did Yuuki want them to read it so it would look more realistic? Or did he really try to hide it from them? Who knows?). Sakuma asked for him not to tell the others out of fear of how they would take it, and Amari understood completely. It was two whole weeks of Sakuma and Miyoshi being alone before Kaminaga showed up. As tied up as the others were, they all had visited him within two years, even though some were in foreign countries at that time. All together, things were going swimmingly.

 _Maybe I should write a book about this. With the names removed, of course. Maybe even a short story on a certain little girl._ He was free now, finally free. All was finally well.

* * *

I walked into my father’s study as he was writing another one of his books. Usually, they were about East Asian spies who were sometimes Asian American, having Japanese as their race with them sometimes being Chinese, or it was about an English girl growing up in Hawaii. As time passed, this girl grew older, with her now about to enter into journalism. I see that he wasn’t currently writing, his hands over the typewriter without moving them, before I said “Father, how are you?”

He looked at me and smiled. “Wonderful. I just needed inspiration, and now, before I write, I have an important question to ask you-”

“I’m not dating anyone, and Uncle Keiji gave me the photos.” I raised the brown bag that had them, and father gently grabbed it from my hand.

“I didn’t think that you were dating anyone, though I am surprised that you even mentioned it.”

“You’ve always have been overprotective of me. One Papa is enough, but with eight uncles…”

He smiled at my misery. “So, I’m Papa again?”

“I just want to grow up. Be a young woman who changes the world, and makes it a better place. You know, make everyone happy.”

He smiled at that. “I understand, you want to be a mature young woman. I have no problem with that, I’ll love you with all my heart and all my soul either way.”

“Just be careful of boys, right?”

“Just the scary ones, is all. There are a lot of scary ones.” He signed and opened the bag.

“I’m sure none of you guys will let any scary ones get that close to me.”

“Monstrous as we are, we’re still only human. I’m just scared that-”

“I won’t make the right choices?”

“Of course you can't have every choice be the right choice, that’s the point of life. The most that we can and should do is to use our wisdom to divine the best option, and work hard to get there.” He was looking at the photo the whole time we spent talking I sneaked up from behind to see what it was.

“Is that… me?”

“Yes, it’s you, me, and Frate on a hammock in a photo taken by Uncle Kaminaga. He had just gotten back from Japan, and wanted to take a photo without asking.”

“I’m sure that it would’d ruined our peaceful looking expressions.”

“True… That man has always known how to take a photo. … Is his shop going well?”

“Yeah, he still has a lot of customers, though I’m his ‘extra special little customer’”. I made a small growl. “I’m not ten anymore.”

“No, but you just acted so the way you did just now.”

“No I didn’t” I said in a polite manner.

“Yes, you did. As always, adorable.” He started typing again. “I think that I know what I want to happen this chapter.”

“The girl visits her Papa?”

Just then, Papa smiled a very bright smile that made my heart feel warmer. “Yes. The perfect ending to the spy story.”

“I thought that it would be the end to the girl who lived in Hawaii?”

“It’s the end to both.” With that, he finished up what he was typing. “Do you want to sleep here? It’s a little bit late now.”

I could had said something about the safety of where we lived, how I’m now an adult, or how I didn’t want to be a burden, but instead I said “Yes.” It wasn’t entirely to make him happy though. I just love this place too much.

And so I went to my old room with my old boy Frate and my old dolphin toy. Just before I went to sleep, he closed the door and said “Good night, Emma”.

“I love you too, Papa.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> My next fic will either be how they named Yoru, or how Sakuma and Miyoshi got up to this point. The former is a one chapter fic, but whichever comes first. I'll do both, though, so don't worry. Also, did you guys like the ending?

**Author's Note:**

> Please tell me if that was too mushy. Most of the chapters will be from Emma's POV, but some will be in Amari's. Please tell me what you think so that I can improve it.  
> Do you like the title?


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